Danny's Own Story Read online

  Produced by Judith Boss

  DANNY'S OWN STORY

  By Don Marquis

  TO MY WIFE

  CHAPTER I

  HOW I come not to have a last name is a question that has always hadmore or less aggervation mixed up with it. I might of had one jestas well as not if Old Hank Walters hadn't been so all-fired, infernalbull-headed about things in gineral, and his wife Elmira a blame sightworse, and both of em ready to row at a minute's notice and stick to itforevermore.

  Hank, he was considerable of a lusher. One Saturday night, when he comehome from the village in his usual fix, he stumbled over a basket thatwas setting on his front steps. Then he got up and drawed back his footunsteady to kick it plumb into kingdom come. Jest then he hearn Elmiraopening the door behind him, and he turned his head sudden. But the kickwas already started into the air, and when he turns he can't stop it.And so Hank gets twisted and falls down and steps on himself. Thatbasket lets out a yowl.

  "It's kittens," says Hank, still setting down and staring at that therebasket. All of which, you understand, I am a-telling you from hearsay,as the lawyers always asts you in court.

  Elmira, she sings out:

  "Kittens, nothing! It's a baby!"

  And she opens the basket and looks in and it was me.

  "Hennerey Walters," she says--picking me up, and shaking me at him likeI was a crime, "Hennerey Walters, where did you get this here baby?" Shealways calls him Hennerey when she is getting ready to give him fits.

  Hank, he scratches his head, for he's kind o' confuddled, and thinksmebby he really has brought this basket with him. He tries to think ofall the places he has been that night. But he can't think of any placebut Bill Nolan's saloon. So he says:

  "Elmira, honest, I ain't had but one drink all day." And then he kind o'rouses up a little bit, and gets surprised and says:

  "That a BABY you got there, Elmira?" And then he says, dignified: "Sofur as that's consarned, Elmira, where did YOU get that there baby?"

  She looks at him, and she sees he don't really know where I come from.Old Hank mostly was truthful when lickered up, fur that matter, and sheknowed it, fur he couldn't think up no lies excepting a gineral denialwhen intoxicated up to the gills.

  Elmira looks into the basket. They was one of them long rubber tubesstringing out of a bottle that was in it, and I had been sucking thatbottle when interrupted. And they wasn't nothing else in that basket buta big thick shawl which had been wrapped all around me, and Elmiraoften wore it to meeting afterward. She goes inside and she looks atthe bottle and me by the light, and Old Hank, he comes stumbling inafterward and sets down in a chair and waits to get Hail Columbia forcoming home in that shape, so's he can row back agin, like they doneevery Saturday night.

  Blowed in the glass of the bottle was the name: "Daniel, Dunne andCompany." Anybody but them two old ignoramuses could of told right offthat that didn't have nothing to do with me, but was jest the companythat made them kind of bottles. But she reads it out loud three or fourtimes, and then she says:

  "His name is Daniel Dunne," she says.

  "And Company," says Hank, feeling right quarrelsome.

  "COMPANY hain't no name," says she.

  "WHY hain't it, I'd like to know?" says Hank. "I knowed a man oncetwhose name was Farmer, and if a farmer's a name why ain't a company aname too?"

  "His name is Daniel Dunne," says Elmira, quietlike, but not dodging arow, neither.

  "AND COMPANY," says Hank, getting onto his feet, like he always donewhen he seen trouble coming. When Old Hank was full of licker he knowedjest the ways to aggervate her the worst.

  She might of banged him one the same as usual, and got her own eyeblacked also, the same as usual; but jest then I lets out another bigyowl, and she give me some milk.

  I guess the only reason they ever kep' me at first was so they couldquarrel about my name. They'd lived together a good many years andquarrelled about everything else under the sun, and was running out ofsubjects. A new subject kind o' briskened things up fur a while.

  But finally they went too far with it one time. I was about two yearsold then and he was still calling me Company and her calling me Dunne.This time he hits her a lick that lays her out and likes to kill her,and it gets him scared. But she gets around agin after a while, and theyboth see it has went too fur that time, and so they makes up.

  "Elmira, I give in," says Hank. "His name is Dunne."

  "No," says she, tender-like, "you was right, Hank. His name is Company."So they pretty near got into another row over that. But they finallymade it up between em I didn't have no last name, and they'd jest callme Danny. Which they both done faithful ever after, as agreed.

  Old Hank, he was a blacksmith, and he used to lamm me considerable, himand his wife not having any kids of their own to lick. He lammed me whenhe was drunk, and he whaled me when he was sober. I never helt it upagin him much, neither, not fur a good many years, because he got meused to it young, and I hadn't never knowed nothing else. Hank's wife,Elmira, she used to lick him jest about as often as he licked her, andboss him jest as much. So he fell back on me. A man has jest naturallygot to have something to cuss around and boss, so's to keep himselffrom finding out he don't amount to nothing. Leastways, most men is likethat. And Hank, he didn't amount to much; and he kind o' knowed it, waydown deep in his inmost gizzards, and it were a comfort to him to haveme around.

  But they was one thing he never sot no store by, and I got along now towhere I hold that up agin him more'n all the lickings he ever done. Thatwas book learning. He never had none himself, and he was sot agin it,and he never made me get none, and if I'd ever asted him for any he'dof whaled me fur that. Hank's wife, Elmira, had married beneath her, andeverybody in our town had come to see it, and used to sympathize withher about it when Hank wasn't around. She'd tell em, yes, it was so.Back in Elmira, New York, from which her father and mother come to ourpart of Illinoise in the early days, her father had kep' a hotel,and they was stylish kind o' folks. When she was born her mother washomesick fur all that style and fur York State ways, and so she namedher Elmira.

  But when she married Hank, he had considerable land. His father had leftit to him, but it was all swamp land, and so Hank's father, he huntedmore'n he farmed, and Hank and his brothers done the same when he was aboy. But Hank, he learnt a little blacksmithing when he was growing up,cause he liked to tinker around and to show how stout he was. Then,when he married Elmira Appleton, he had to go to work practising thatperfession reg'lar, because he never learnt nothing about farming. He'dsell fifteen or twenty acres, every now and then, and they'd be hightimes till he'd spent it up, and mebby Elmira would get some newclothes.

  But when I was found on the door step, the land was all gone, and Hankwas practising reg'lar, when not busy cussing out the fellers that hadbought the land. Fur some smart fellers had come along, and bought upall that swamp land and dreened it, and now it was worth seventy oreighty dollars an acre. Hank, he figgered some one had cheated him.Which the Walterses could of dreened theirn too, only they'd rutherhunt ducks and have fish frys than to dig ditches. All of which I hearnElmira talking over with the neighbours more'n once when I was growingup, and they all says: "How sad it is you have came to this, Elmira!"And then she'd kind o' spunk up and say, thanks to glory, she'd kep' herpride.

  Well, they was worse places to live in than that there little town, evenif they wasn't no railroad within eight miles, and only three hundredsoles in the hull copperation. Which Hank's shop and our house set inthe edge of the woods jest outside the copperation line, so's the citymarshal didn't have no authority to arrest him after he crossed it.

  They was one thing in that house I always admired when I was
a kid. Andthat was a big cistern. Most people has their cisterns outside theirhouse, and they is a tin pipe takes all the rain water off the roof andscoots it into them. Ourn worked the same, but our cistern was right inunder our kitchen floor, and they was a trap door with leather hingesopened into it right by the kitchen stove. But that wasn't why I wasso proud of it. It was because that cistern was jest plumb full offish--bullheads and red horse and sunfish and other kinds.

  Hank's father had built that cistern. And one time he brung home somelive fish in a bucket and dumped em in there. And they growed. And theymultiplied in there and refurnished the earth. So that cistern had gotto be a fambly custom, which was kep' up in that fambly for a habit.It was a great comfort to Hank, fur all them Walterses was great fisheaters, though it never went to brains. We fed em now and then, andthrowed back in the little ones till they was growed, and kep' the deadones picked out soon's we smelled anything wrong, and it never hurt thewater none; and when I was a kid I wouldn't of took anything fur livingin a house like that.

  Oncet, when I was a kid about six years old, Hank come home from thebar-room. He got to chasing Elmira's cat cause he says it was makingfaces at him. The cistern door was open, and Hank fell in. Elmira wasover to town, and I was scared. She had always told me not to foolaround there none when I was a little kid, fur if I fell in there I'd bea corpse quicker'n scatt.

  So when Hank fell in, and I hearn him splash, being only a littlefeller, and awful scared because Elmira had always made it so strong,I hadn't no sort of unbelief but what Hank was a corpse already. So Islams the trap door shut over that there cistern without looking in,fur I hearn Hank flopping around down in there. I hadn't never hearna corpse flop before, and didn't know but what it might be somehowinjurious to me, and I wasn't going to take no chances.

  So I went out and played in the front yard, and waited fur Elmira. ButI couldn't seem to get my mind settled on playing I was a horse, nornothing. I kep' thinking mebby Hank's corpse is going to come floppingout of that cistern and whale me some unusual way. I hadn't never beenlicked by a corpse, and didn't rightly know jest what one is, anyhow,being young and comparitive innocent. So I sneaks back in and setsall the flatirons in the house on top of the cistern lid. I hearn someflopping and splashing and spluttering, like Hank's corpse is trying tojump up and is falling back into the water, and I hearn Hank's voice,and got scareder yet. And when Elmira come along down the road, she seenme by the gate a-crying, and she asts me why.

  "Hank is a corpse," says I, blubbering.

  "A corpse!" says Elmira, dropping her coffee which she was carrying homefrom the gineral store and post-office. "Danny, what do you mean?"

  I seen I was to blame somehow, and I wisht then I hadn't said nothingabout Hank being a corpse. And I made up my mind I wouldn't say nothingmore. So when she grabs holt of me and asts me agin what did I meanI blubbered harder, jest the way a kid will, and says nothing else. Iwisht I hadn't set them flatirons on that door, fur it come to me all atoncet that even if Hank HAS turned into a corpse I ain't got any rightto keep him in that cistern.

  Jest then Old Mis' Rogers, which is one of our neighbours, comes by,while Elmira is shaking me and yelling out what did I mean and how didit happen and had I saw it and where was Hank's corpse?

  And Mis' Rogers she says, "What's Danny been doing now, Elmira?" mebeing always up to something.

  Elmira she turned around and seen her, and she gives a whoop and thenhollers out: "Hank is dead!" and throws her apern over her head and setsright down in the path and boo-hoos like a baby. And I bellers louder.

  Mis' Rogers, she never waited to ast nothing more. She seen she had apiece of news, and she's bound to be the first to spread it, like theyis always a lot of women wants to be in them country towns. She runright acrost the road to where the Alexanderses lived. Mis' Alexander,she seen her coming and unhooked the screen door, and Mis' Rogers shehollers out before she reached the porch:

  "Hank Walters is dead."

  And then she went footing it up the street. They was a black plume onher bunnet which nodded the same as on a hearse, and she was into andout of seven front yards in five minutes.

  Mis' Alexander, she runs acrost the street to where we was, and shekneels down and puts her arm around Elmira, which was still rocking backand forth in the path, and she says:

  "How do you know he's dead, Elmira? I seen him not more'n an hour ago."

  "Danny seen it all," says Elmira.

  Mis' Alexander turned to me, and wants to know what happened and how ithappened and where it happened. But I don't want to say nothing aboutthat cistern. So I busts out bellering fresher'n ever, and I says:

  "He was drunk, and he come home drunk, and he done it then, and that'show he done it," I says.

  "And you seen him?" she says. I nodded.

  "Where is he?" says she and Elmira, both to oncet.

  But I was scared to say nothing about that there cistern, so I jestbawled some more.

  "Was it in the blacksmith shop?" says Mis' Alexander. I nodded my headagin and let it go at that.

  "Is he in there now?" asts Mis' Alexander. I nodded agin. I hadn't meantto give out no untrue stories. But a kid will always tell a lie, notmeaning to tell one, if you sort of invite him with questions like that,and get him scared the way you're acting. Besides, I says to myself, "solong as Hank has turned into a corpse and that makes him dead, what'sthe difference whether he's in the blacksmith shop or not?" Fur I hadn'thad any plain idea, being such a little kid, that a corpse meant to bedead, and wasn't sure what being dead was like, neither, except they hadfunerals over you then. I knowed being a corpse must be some sort ofa big disadvantage from the way Elmira always says keep away from thatcistern door or I'll be one. But if they was going to be a funeral inour house, I'd feel kind o' important, too. They didn't have em everyday in our town, and we hadn't never had one of our own.

  So Mis' Alexander, she led Elmira into the house, both a-crying, andMis' Alexander trying to comfort her, and me a tagging along behindholding onto Elmira's skirts and sniffling into them. And in a fewminutes all them women Mis' Rogers has told come filing into that room,one at a time, looking sad. Only Old Mis' Primrose, she was awful lategetting there because she stopped to put on her bunnet she always woreto funerals with the black Paris lace on it her cousin Arminty White hadsent her from Chicago.

  When they found out Hank had come home with licker in him and done ithimself, they was all excited, and they all crowds around and asts mehow, except two as is holding onto Elmira's hands which sets moaning ina chair. And they all asts me questions as to what I seen him do, whichif they hadn't I wouldn't have told em the lies I did. But they egged meon to it.

  Says one woman: "Danny, you seen him do it in the blacksmith shop?"

  I nodded.

  "But how did he get in?" sings out another woman. "The door was lockedon the outside with a padlock jest now when I come by. He couldn't ofkilled himself in there and locked the door on the outside."

  I didn't see how he could of done that myself, so I begun to bawl aginand said nothing at all.

  "He must of crawled through that little side window," says another one."It was open when I come by, if the door WAS locked. Did you see himcrawl through the little side window, Danny?"

  I nodded. They wasn't nothing else fur me to do.

  "But YOU hain't tall enough to look through that there window," saysanother one to me. "How could you see into that shop, Danny?"

  I didn't know, so I didn't say nothing at all; I jest sniffled.

  "They is a store box right in under that window," says another one."Danny must have clumb onto that store box and looked in after he seenHank come down the road and crawl through the window. Did you scrambleonto the store box and look in, Danny?"

  I jest nodded agin.

  "And what was it you seen him do? How did he kill himself?" they allasts to oncet.

  _I_ didn't know. So I jest bellers and boo-hoos some more. Things wasgetting past anything I cou
ld see the way out of.

  "He might of hung himself to one of the iron rings in the jists abovethe forge," says another woman. "He clumb onto the forge to tie the ropeto one of them rings, and he tied the other end around his neck, andthen he stepped off'n the forge. Was that how he done it, Danny?"

  I nodded. And then I bellered louder than ever. I knowed Hank was downin that there cistern, a corpse and a mighty wet corpse, all this time;but they kind o' got me to thinking mebby he was hanging out in the shopby the forge, too. And I guessed I'd better stick to the shop story, notwanting to say nothing about that cistern no sooner'n I could help it.

  Pretty soon one woman says, kind o' shivery:

  "I don't want to have the job of opening the door of that blacksmithshop the first one!"

  And they all kind o' shivered then, and looked at Elmira. They says tolet some of the men open it. And Mis' Alexander, she says she'll runhome and tell her husband right off.

  And all the time Elmira is moaning in that chair. One woman says Elmiraorter have a cup o' tea, which she'll lay off her bunnet and go to thekitchen and make it fur her. But Elmira says no, she can't a-bear tothink of tea, with poor Hennerey a-hanging out there in the shop. Butshe was kind o' enjoying all that fuss being made over her, too. And allthe other women says:

  "Poor thing!" But all the same they was mad she said she didn't want anytea, for they all wanted some and didn't feel free without she took ittoo. Which she said she would after they'd coaxed a while and made hersee her duty.

  So they all goes out to the kitchen, bringing along some of the bestroom chairs, Elmira coming too, and me tagging along behind. And thefirst thing they noticed was them flatirons on top of the cistern door.Mis' Primrose, she says that looks funny. But another woman speaks upand says Danny must of been playing with them while Elmira was overtown. She says, "Was you playing they was horses, Danny?"

  I was feeling considerable like a liar by this time, but I says I wasplaying horses with them, fur I couldn't see no use in hurrying thingsup. I was bound to get a lamming purty soon anyhow. When I was a kid Icould always bet on that. So they picks up the flatirons, and as theypicks em up they come a splashing noise in the cistern. I thinks tomyself, Hank's corpse'll be out of there in a minute. One woman, shesays:

  "Goodness gracious sakes alive! What's that, Elmira?"

  Elmira says that cistern is mighty full of fish, and they is some greatbig ones in there, and it must be some of them a-flopping around. Whichif they hadn't of been all worked up and talking all to oncet and allthinking of Hank's body hanging out there in the blacksmith shop theymight of suspicioned something. For that flopping kep' up steady, and alot of splashing too. I mebby orter mentioned sooner it had been a drysummer and they was only three or four feet of water in our cistern, andHank wasn't in scarcely up to his big hairy chest. So when Elmira saysthe cistern is full of fish, that woman opens the trap door and looksin. Hank thinks it's Elmira come to get him out. He allows he'll keepquiet in there and make believe he is drowned and give her a good scareand make her sorry fur him. But when the cistern door is opened, hehears a lot of clacking tongues all of a sudden like they was a henconvention on. He allows she has told some of the neighbours, and he'llscare them too. So Hank, he laid low. And the woman as looks in seesnothing, for it's as dark down there as the insides of the whale whatswallered Noah. But she leaves the door open and goes on a-making tea,and they ain't skeercly a sound from that cistern, only little, ripplynoises like it might have been fish.

  Pretty soon a woman says:

  "It has drawed, Elmira; won't you have a cup?" Elmira she kicked somemore, but she took hern. And each woman took hern. And one woman,a-sipping of hern, she says:

  "The departed had his good pints, Elmira."

  Which was the best thing had been said of Hank in that town fur yearsand years.

  Old Mis' Primrose, she always prided herself on being honest, no matterwhat come, and she ups and says:

  "I don't believe in no hippercritics at a time like this, no more'n noother time. The departed wasn't no good, and the hull town knowed it;and Elmira orter feel like it's good riddance of bad rubbish and them ismy sentiments and the sentiments of rightfulness."

  All the other women sings out:

  "W'y, MIS' PRIMROSE! I never!" And they seemed awful shocked. But downin underneath more of em agreed than let on. Elmira she wiped her eyesand she said:

  "Hennerey and me has had our troubles. They ain't any use in denyingthat, Mis' Primrose. It has often been give and take between us andbetwixt us. And the hull town knows he has lifted his hand agin memore'n oncet. But I always stood up to Hennerey, and I fit him back,free and fair and open. I give him as good as he sent on this hereearth, and I ain't the one to carry no annermosities beyond the grave. Iforgive Hank all the orneriness he done me, and they was a lot of it, asis becoming unto a church member, which he never was."

  And all the women but Mis' Primrose, they says:

  "Elmira Appleton, you HAVE got a Christian sperrit!" Which done her aheap of good, and she cried considerable harder, leaking out tears asfast as she poured tea in. Each one on em tries to find out somethinggood to say about Hank, only they wasn't much they could say. And Hankin that there cistern a-listening to every word of it.

  Mis' Rogers, she says:

  "Afore he took to drinking like a fish, Hank Walters was as likelylooking a young feller as I ever see."

  Mis' White, she says:

  "Well, Hank he never was a stingy man, nohow. Often and often White hastold me about seeing Hank, after he'd sold a piece of land, treating thehull town down in Nolan's bar-room jest as come-easy, go-easy as if itwasn't money he orter paid his honest debts with."

  They set there that-a-way telling of what good pints they could think offur ten minutes, and Hank a-hearing it and getting madder and madderall the time. The gineral opinion was that Hank wasn't no good andwas better done fur, and no matter what they said them feelings kep'sticking out through the words.

  By and by Tom Alexander come busting into the house, and his wife, Mis'Alexander, was with him.

  "What's the matter with all you folks," he says. "They ain't nobodyhanging in that there blacksmith shop. I broke the door down and wentin, and it was empty."

  Then they was a pretty howdy-do, and they all sings out:

  "Where's the corpse?"

  And some thinks mebby some one has cut it down and took it away, and allgabbles to oncet. But for a minute no one thinks mebby little Danny hasbeen egged on to tell lies. Little Danny ain't saying a word. But Elmirashe grabs me and shakes me and she says:

  "You little liar, you, what do you mean by that tale you told?"

  I thinks that lamming is about due now. But whilst all eyes is turned onme and Elmira, they comes a voice from that cistern. It is Hank's voice,and he sings out:

  "Tom Alexander, is that you?"

  Some of the women scream, for some thinks it is Hank's ghost. But onewoman says what would a ghost be doing in a cistern?

  Tom Alexander, he laughs and he says:

  "What in blazes you want to jump in there fur, Hank?"

  "You dern ijut!" says Hank, "you quit mocking me and get a ladder, andwhen I get out'n here I'll learn you to ast what did I want to jump inhere fur!"

  "You never seen the day you could do it," says Tom Alexander, meaningthe day he could lick him. "And if you feel that way about it you canstay there fur all of me. I guess a little water won't hurt you none."And he left the house.

  "Elmira," sings out Hank, mad and bossy, "you go get me a ladder!"

  But Elmira, her temper riz up too, all of a sudden.

  "Don't you dare order me around like I was the dirt under your feet,Hennerey Walters," she says.

  At that Hank fairly roared, he was so mad. He says:

  "Elmira, when I get out'n here I'll give you what you won't fergit in ahurry. I hearn you a-forgiving me and a-weeping over me, and I won't beforgive nor weeped over by no one! You go and get that ladder."
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br />   But Elmira only answers:

  "You wasn't sober when you fell into there, Hennerey Walters. And nowyou can jest stay in there till you get a better temper on you!" And allthe women says: "That's right, Elmira; spunk up to him!"

  They was considerable splashing around in the water fur a couple ofminutes. And then, all of a sudden, a live fish come a-whirling outof that hole, which he had ketched it with his hands. It was a bigbullhead, and its whiskers around its mouth was stiffened into spikes,and it lands kerplump into Mis' Rogers's lap, a-wiggling, and it kindo' horns her on the hands, and she is that surprised she faints. Mis'Primrose, she gets up and pushes that fish back into the cistern withher foot from the floor where it had fell, and she says right decided:

  "Elmira Walters, that was Elmira Appleton, if you let Hank out'n thatcistern before he has signed the pledge and promised to jine the churchyou're a bigger fool 'n I take you to be. A woman has got to make astand!" With that she marches out'n our house.

  Then all the women sings out:

  "Send fur Brother Cartwright! Send fur Brother Cartwright!"

  And they sent me scooting acrost town to get him quick. Which he was thepreacher of the Baptist church and lived next to it. And I hadn't got nolamming yet!